Taskeen
Staying on the ground floor of our apartment, she used to stand in the balcony ... Or rather her mother used to make her stand in the balcony ... Just so, she will get some fresh air... She was a one year old child then... Just began babbling ... and standing on her own ... she used to call each passer by .. I mean, just make a babbling happy sound when she used to see someone ... I was one of the passer who she found worth making a babbling happy sound for ... I must be 15 or 16 years old then ... It was not that I had never seen a child before in my life .. But maybe it was the happiness in her sound which drew me closer towards her ...I never could ignore that babbling sound and just pass by her ... On hearing that sound, I used to go close to her balcony .. stand outside and talk to her for a few minutes .. then I used to be on my way ... these balcony-to-road interactions continued for few months .. she slowly started uttering few words ... her mother soon became aware of me talking to her frequently ... she taught Taskeen to call me "didi" .. after a few months of interactions Taskeen's mother asked me to come inside the house ... I was so well received with "a cup of tea" ... Taskeen's grand mother also was at home ... I can't forget Taskeen's mother's smile ... which Taskeen inherited ... I realized that the smile must have a lot of pain behind it ... pain of being away from her husband for a very long duration ... pain of being alone even in crowd ... pain of needs not getting met ... either physical or emotional ... Taskeen's father used to be in Dubai for work ... he used to visit once in a year for a month or so ... Taskeen's elder brother used to play comfortably with other kids in the apartment ... mostly cricket ... or used to ride bicycle ... Taskeen's mother never let her own worries pass on to Taskeen ... she brought up Taskeen very well ... a healthy and happy child ... I soon became very fond of her ... our interactions continued either at her home or in front of the balcony ... days flew ... Taskeen became 4 to 5 year old child ... I was on an "education break" then ... to continue my masters ... I asked Taskeen's mother's permission to take her outside our apartment ... she happily allowed ... Then Taskeen and I went to Vashi-Sea-Shore ... She walked all the way ... even though the distance was a lot for a child ... she never asked me to pick her up ... very understanding child ... Her mother and grandmother used to ask me questions about my schooling ... which school would be better for Taskeen ... how will the commute be ... any extra classes that we need for children's growth etc ... as I grew up more and went for my masters, my interactions with Taskeen reduced ... Taskeen grew up and used to come to our home on the second floor ... most of the time I opened the door for her at my home and played with her for some time... however a couple of times I did not open the door for her when she came ... one reason was, I became busy with my studies and other reason was my interactions with her were not quite appreciated at my home ... since she had an Islamic background ... These days I am realizing that I could have opened the door for her and asked her to go back to her home ... but at that time even I was not quite adult enough to understand whether a child be able to take a "No" ... Then I got married and moved out of Vashi ... Taskeen was not in my life anymore ... Though she never slipped out of my mind ...
Shayeesta
I first met Shayeesta when Hiren's friends gathered at Ahemdabad's home after our marriage... KureshiBhai was one of Hiren's friends. Shayeesta was his fiancee. KureshiBhai and Shayeesta just got engaged that time ... Shayeesta was a thin and beautiful girl... First time I realized what might be considered as a "beauty" in Islamic culture. Extremely respectful, as expected in Islamic culture... However Hiren's friends were teasing both of them (KureshiBhai and Shayeesta) over falling in love. She just smiled over all the teasing ... talked very less .. Girl's not talking in a mixed group .. also seemed like a part of Islamic culture .. because Gujrati Hindu girls believed in talking a lot in a mixed group ... I remember that Shayeesta was not originally from Gujrat .. Her family migrated from North India to Gujrat... That explains the "respectful" behaviour ... Even I was newly married at that time ... So I had almost nothing to talk to her, except the basic greetings .. So it turned out to be a gathering of mixed group where men were talking and having fun, and women just listened ... days passed .. KureshiBhai and Shayeesta both got married ... We could not attend their marriage ... we heard that they both moved to Japan for KureshiBhai's work .. while coming back, they gifted us a very beautiful "wall hanging" from Japan which I liked a lot ... After some days, we heard that they both moved to Middle East ... I was very happy that KureshiBhai took Shayeesta along with him to Middle East ... Because my previous experience with Indian Muslims and Hindus was that, only men move to Middle East .. Not women ... that is because of the safety issues as well as the extremely conservative Islamic Culture in the Middle East when it comes to women ... Soon they got two children .. both sons .. I did not have any direct contact with Shayeesta and KureshiBhai except the information I got through Hiren ... KureshiBhai talked over call or email to Hiren ... Once in a while all Hiren's friends used to gather in Ahemdabad with their wives and children .. By next 4 to 5 years, everyone got busy with their lives ... So is Shayeesta .. got busy with children .. Beautiful family ... However I think being in the MiddleEast, they frequently debated over moving to India ... for many years ... Why? ... That part was unknown to me ... probably its a similar struggle which Indians face while moving to the western countries .. probably it gets more complex ... because when Indians migrate from India to Western Countries, they move to more "open-ness" ... whereas when they migrate from India to Middle East, they move to more "close-ness" ... Anyways ...I think this "close-ness" is experienced only by women ... for men it does not matter ... what matters for any man these days is the "infrastructure" and the "working culture".. However children grew up ... KureshiBhai and Shayeesta moved to India ... At first glance, it seemed to be a permanent move ... However soon Kureshibhai realized that it's quite a struggle to live in India ... mainly when it comes to Infrastructure and the working environment ...the same struggle which all Indians face while moving back to India ... probably it gets more complex for his Islamic background in India ... by this time their children were admitted to school and Shayeesta was working in her father's garments shop ... So he decided to keep them here and move to the MiddleEast alone ... I did not like that move, because I did not want Shayeesta to end up like Taskeen's mother ... However it was their "family matter" ... so they had to make a decision ... Though I do not have any recent updates from Shayeesta and KureshiBhai, I wish good for their family with more "certainty" and "stability" ...
Heena
A young student from a German university whom I guided for a project... I heard about her from a colleague... I was impressed by knowing about her ... she had an Islamic background .. I found myself privileged to work with an Islamic woman who was from outside India ... also, I already was aware of Islamic values like "respect", "space" ingrained in its culture, which I would have liked to experience again ... she had completed her masters degree in Cognitive Science ... being a woman in science in Islam is commendable ... I did not know whether she realized its importance ... but yes, I definitely realized it ... Work began ...We interacted over video calls ... her beauty mesmerized me .. beauty is of two types ... one which draws closer and other which needs space .. in my experience Islamic beauty is of later type ... it required a few minutes of interaction for me to get myself out of the silver cloud of beauty and see things clearly ... she was mostly a bilingual or multilingual personality ... very important in today's world .. it helps in increasing the knowledge span... she used to persist over an issue ... to find more information about it ...I liked that ... I realized that she had the ability to get information out of me ... which otherwise may have gotten lost in my mind ... very few people can get information out of me ... not because I hide information ... but simply because I do not realize that, even if the information is not important to me, it might be important for others ... hence I do not state it ... interactions continued ... I realized that she genuinely wanted to help me out in my analysis ... I had the habit of taking down notes during discussions ...which is an old habit of course ... but she shared screenshots of information which she captured ... it helped me understand, the way the younger generation captures information and makes use of technology ... project moved forward ... or rather, I did not realize that it was moving forward ... because of sudden lack of communication from Heena ... over about two months ... I was aware that the phase of information gathering was complete ... and it was a time of execution ... which need not require interactions ... however I was not aware of the happenings ... I did not want to raise a question about "sudden information lack" ... because it would seem bossy ... I kept myself busy ... days passed ... interactions began again and after some information exchange, the project was completed ... no hurdles ... smooth flow ... smooth life ... just not seemed challenging enough ... this happens when we get quality people to work with ... but getting quality people itself is rare these days .... there was "respect" ... there was "space" ... but still something was off ... what was it? ... maybe it was my expectations about the project ... I had plans for it further ... but no one seemed to be interested in those plans ... the interactions were at such a minimum level that the people never could bond ... no bonding ... led to no further sharing ... and no sharing means no caring ... isn't it?
Rubina
My maid ... I am thinking or rather anyone will think what is special about maid? ... It's day to day interactions ... the chores ... and payment at the end of the month ... I somewhere map maid's life to my work life ... its just that I get paid more than the maid ... so I thought let me reflect back on the life of my maid ... Rubina .. she came at my home in search of work ... after the initial negotiations about the payment, I decided to give her an oppotunity to work at my home ... I asked her to continue from the next day ... she left ... Hiren was sitting and observing our interaction ... he asked "what is her name?" ... I said "Rubina" ... he realized, probably from her name, that she might have an Islamic background ... I thought for a moment... Her being from an Islamic background, really did not seem like a problem to me ... also, it did not occur to me at that moment, that my parents or Hiren's parents may have problems ... so I allowed her to continue ... days passed ... she worked well ... one day I realized that she really is from Islamic background ... I might have realized from her festival celebration I guess ... however things continued smoothly ... for me, the most important point was she was riding a two wheeler to get to work ... which was defining her progress in life as a woman ... she was the only maid in our society that time who was riding a two wheeler to go to work ... I could sense a little envy among other maids for her ... the other homemakers who were from good backgrounds also were 'mocking' her behind her back rather than 'encouraging' her for her small achievement in life ... or being proud of her ... I did not understand whether to laugh or to cry at the society's behaviour towards Rubina ... I think she was aware of it ... days passed .. it must have been almost an year or so .. Rubina became irregular at work ... probably she found more places to work or she thought we are paying her less ... one day when she came at our home to work, I started doing her chores already ... because I realized it is already too late for Rubina to do the work ... it got late for me to open the door for her while doing her chores ... she was angry ... why I was late to open the door? ... I simply could not understand the behaviour ... the anger ... she used to be quite respectful on other days ... however I did not say anything ... just let her know the "reality" that I am doing her chores ... few days passed ... she did not let me know if she has certain demands ... or difficulties in life ... and I too did not inquire anything upfront because it seem very interrogative ... I was seeing the irregular behaviour of a regular person ... and the same behaviour repeated again ... she did not come for work without any prior notification ... and I decided to discontinue her services .. in our last meeting, I told her that she is a really good person ...I liked her work ... but I cannot keep up with the irregularity anymore ... Rubina left ..
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