Thursday, 22 January 2026

My Life As a HouseWife - Part 2

I spent the initial few weeks after lay-off at home. Preparing for interviews. Soon Hiren got me a laptop and a Lego Robotics kit. I did not understand the use of Lego Robotics kit at all. Now, after 11 years of working on the Lego Robotics kit,  I realized I must be naive to say that. However, this kit helped me in my life to educate myself with basic Robotics and also to judge my potential to teach young students. Even though I got the kit in 2008, I started working on it only from 2012. For these 4 years in between, I was literally desperate about following other options like, getting a job and earning some money, applying for GRE and getting further education, writing my own "music" application for mobile and publishing it on Google Playstore (as mobile was new to me that time). But somehow nothing clicked for 4 years. And then I started taking Lego seriously. A lot of its creation material is on the internet. Once I got a little hang of following their instructions and assembling the robots, I did the initial few programs in their graphical language. But soon I realized that even though the graphical language is for young students, I am finding it hard to learn. Then while browsing, I realized that Lego Robots have supported the language "Java". I was comfortable with programming in Java, because I had worked on it in my professional life. I started programming with Java, in order to give "movements" to the robots. The best part was, I was able to send the data to the computer in order to plot the graph of the robot's movements. Soon I got another kit of Lego Robotics with the new version. And I worked on its creations. Till then 6 years passed. I also did two software jobs in the meanwhile for 2 years. When my second job ended, one of my young students' mother asked me, if I can teach Robotics to youngsters. I happily agreed. I taught students for 1 year in their summer and diwali vacation as an extra subject. I taught nearly 8 students with the two Lego Robotics kits I had. I put their projects on my blog as an achievement for them and me. In the next one year, I taught them "electronics" in summer and diwali vacations. This time, I asked the students to speak on camera while presenting. In their earlier projects, I had asked them to just showcase the robot's movements. The students were very enthusiastic for presenting their work. When we used to get stuck at certain points (may be during programming), I used to ask them to make somethings of their own, out of the Lego Components. Sometimes, they used to make "cars", sometimes "merry-go-round", sometimes "slides", sometime "swings". But one day one of the students asked me, if we can make "a machine to squeeze sugarcane and get the juice". I was amazed at the student's imagination !

Meanwhile, I also enjoyed my life as a housewife with kitty parties, with the ladies in the society and also attended singing classes. Kitty parties were a lot of fun. Once in a month. Tasty food in the party! Homemade! Awesome! I will never forget those days! But at the same time, if someone calls me for kitty party now, I will politely deny. I think I grew up too mature for having fun! It's an awesome concept ... "kitty party" ! In general girls/women in our society behave as if they are denied the right to have fun. They behave as if the entire responsibility of working for the society's good, is on their own shoulders (which is in a way true!). But they should use their right to have fun sometimes. And kitty party is a means of fun ! 

When it comes to singing, for me, there is no other favorite topic to talk about. It's close to my heart. I found that music has some kind of therapeutic effect on my mind. Even if I am "dead tired", singing a song makes me bounce back with lot of positive energy. I did not try to formally learn music in my young age. I used to listen to the radio programs for songs. And used to copy the singer at home. Since I did not have formal music education, I did not participate any "music program", thinking that I might not be singing well. However, in the recent past years of my life, I learnt Indian Classical music for 2 years. I was learning along with the gathering of few small kids ... 5 to 6 years old ... It was great to see that since such a young age kids start having an ear for music! They pick up music very well. Be it singing or playing an instrument. The advantage for young students is they are pretty adaptable to learn and they get a lot of time to practice. Which is essential for learning music basics. I got an opportunity to sing in the kitty parties as well as the society gatherings on "national days". I did the best I could to sing. I remember the nervousness I experienced when I was singing in the first gathering of ladies. Then onwards I was comfortable. My family members used to think that because of music, I am not able to concentrate on the work. However, I realized that it was not the case. I can listen to music and do my work at the same time. And in case when needed, I was wise enough to turn off the music. Any ways ... I think this is a constant fear in people's mind, that if they learn music or any other art, they will NOT be able to focus on work or studies. In my opinion, they should not have this fear. Until now, I do not understand the details of Indian Classical. I just thrive on the energy, the focus, the passion the artists represent. I especially mentioned "focus", because I realize the value of "focus". For me,  while singing a song or chanting, I can recollect someone's humor. So there are chances that while singing or chanting, I burst into laughter. That behavior is hard to be approved by the society. I do not know whether this phenomenon can be called "lack of focus"? But the end result for myself is "positive energy" ... It keeps me happy. It allows me to move forward in life. Many of the members of the society have a notion that, "A happy song makes us happy" and "A sad song makes us sad". Its a brute-force conclusion and in my opinion they are false notions. Imagine if I have got a huge bonus in the office and I am in a happy state of mind. I come home and the radio plays a sad song. The song will not make me necessarily sad. Because in my mind I am fulfilled of my reward for my work. In the same way, say, I did not get the reward for my work and I am in sad state of mind. After coming home the radio plays a happy song. It may or may not make me happy. So, the song that I "listen" may not necessarily change the state of mind, however the song that I "sing" will definitely define the state of my mind. And according to my experience, it will change the "stress levels" too, which is the state of the body. Also, there are various ways to listen to the songs, some of them listen to it by the "words". Others listen to them by "notes". I listen to it by the above values like "energy", "focus", "passion" etc. When I see a lot of "passion" even in a "sad" song, that song makes me happy. Makes me wonder about the singer's distinguished ability to sing that song! The way I categorize the songs is also by their "virtues". Some song define the energy in the morning. So I classify them as morning songs. Some of them define the energy at night. So I classify them as the "night songs". All songs do not suit my voice. There are only a few songs which suit my voice. A few days back I made a list of those songs which suit my voice. Just so, it has to be handy when ladies ask me to sing a song! Yes true! A couple of years back, in a ladies gathering, I was asked if I can sing a song on the stage. I was OK with it. It was my first stage experience. I was not much nervous in the beginning. I was asked to choose a song to sing. I practiced it. But when I went on stage, I could not help but to "get nervous". Its "stage fear". I still sang the song with all the limitations. Honestly, it was a valuable experience. The ladies gatherings have given me many such experiences to cherish! 







My Life As A HouseWife - Part 1

Becoming a housewife is something I never thought of ... or dreamt of ... Destiny forced it upon me when "lay-off" happened and there were lack of jobs ... In the US ... I was at home and Hiren was working ... In the initial few days, I applied for the job ... as usual, I need to prepare a lot for the interview ... I had to prepare "what have I worked on the job ?" and "how I have done it ?", "any challenges ?" etc ... most importantly I had to work on choosing the right statements and right words to describe my work ... whereas in the office environment generally there is "no need to talk while working" ... so "interview" is the only place where you need to talk "technologically" ... and also work on the "confidence" after lay-off ...


Generally, it is assumed that if a person has worked on a given task a lot, then he/she will have no hurdles in the interview ... but I do not know why (the reason might be "interview" is the only place to talk about technology), I never used to remember the exact work I have done ... there used to be expectations of knowing the work at the "logic level" and "syntax level", which I could never remember ... there can be another level where we could ask questions which is the "domain level" ... I could remember that ... but I think "domain" level comes at very high level of software engineering ... or probably it is altogether different work, "analysis work" ... In one hour of interview, I used to struggle with deriving an algorithm, given a "high level problem statement"  ... I generally need a lot of time to derive logic and consequent algorithm ... for sufficiently complex algorithms, I need 4 to 5 hours or so or even a day when I work ... another level of work could be the "system level" ... where we need to put the architecture in place ... need to derive its inputs and outputs ... and consequent state changes of the system on receiving the input or sending the output ... this level requires high level understanding of the system which I could try to gather ... and found it worth a challenge !


For any interview at any software engineering level, the algorithms which are asked in the interview, are pretty generic (not related to work) ... like generate Fibonacci Series, Reverse the String etc. ... there are participants who remember the exact algorithm ... probably, they work on it quite often ... but I do not remember it unless I practice it during "preparation", just before the interview ... and I wonder if we can derive the "Fibonacci Series" algorithm at the 11th hour ... first of all people who are NOT in mathematics, won't remember "The Fibonacci series" even though it is taught at school... if so, there are no ways to derive the programming logic at 11th hour ...  unless we answer the basic programming questions, we can not go at higher level of software engineering job ... 


My opinion 1 - If I describe the "domain/system" in the interview, the next questions of "building logic" and "building syntax", should be asked around the domain/system. The generic algorithms should be avoided.

My opinion 2 - Why I could never remember my work ? I did not write each statement on my own. I have the habit of copying the basic examples from the "internet" or from a code block already done by someone else, and then put my logic around it. For me, it should have been a matter of explaining only MY logic and NOT the entire logic (which involves copying the basic) in the interview process. 

My opinion 3 - Practice speaking about "technical work" in the office environment.




Saturday, 10 January 2026

Science Festival - 2026 - Notes


Whats next in AI, Spatial Intelligence and World Models


How ai is moving beyond data ?

Next frontier - spatial ai

Generative ai - Generate a photograph/image in the horizon hall

Ai does not understand 3d space. Example - The length canal in front of TajMahal from the image

spatial reasoning
Ability of machines to generate and act, perceive, reason in 3d space and time

3d reconstruction (something like panorama view of physical world in an image/photograph)

VR/AR automated dacing video
how we digitally represent things happening in physical world (ai generates a video). Spatial structure of the world. Give a list of commands to follow, to generate the video

Data for generative AI
1 to 100s of images
These days less data to do the same thing

AI keywords:
multimodal AI
general intelligence
super intelligence
could spatial ai, be one next field ?
4d reasoning is critical
spatial reasoning ability
depth sensor
plenotic function
3d/4d gaussian splatting
dynamic radiance field
understanding/reasoning
action models
special models
Spatial Understanding

Generative AI generates/deals with
- language (generate a poem)
- image (generate an image with required specification)
- video (Generate a dancing video, which later may be on youtube)
- audio

there is no  need of embodiments


From model to market, building scable ai setup startups in India



Panel Discussion - Questions about AI
- Turning ai ideas into innovative products?
- How ai startup grow from concept to market?
- LLM is cheaper but how to extract value out of it? What part of LLM are we going to use? What if the LLM does not help to solve your problem? (If you are working on the edge case which the platform does not solve. For example - Build smaller SLMs and finetune for Indic language. Get compliance in every conversation and audit trail.)
- What a model might do and startup might require?
- The open source are cheaper how to generate revenue?


Some Points:

*  Regardless of what problem you want to solve ai will help
*  Some indian companies are also developing foundation models, as they may be finding some insufficiency in the out of box models for their requirements
* Foundation models give you better starting point
* Don't say I am building foundation model. Its a huge work. How do you build the models well ? How will we differentiate their wellness?
* Models are widely available, very hard to build. By understanding the problem in deeper way.
* Starting today, building a model is not easy. Is the problem large enough? Do you really wish to solve it?
* Why won't google do it tomorrow? It is often a misconception. Large companies like Google, Microsoft do not focus on narrow markets (white spaces). Bigger companies, broader platforms. The companies working on narrow markets should look to differentiate their products. If you have an idea, is problem relevant?
* Even the large companies were initially small. That is the advantage. What matters is vision.
* Get deeper insights about the customer.
* From B2C, working together for "lockscreen",
inmobi made it into a business
* superstars ai - you can create your own virtual cricket match
* Where are indian startups doling well ? Multiple industries (education, healthcare, deeptek, security, general pharmaceutical etc). AI solution exist at lower cost.
* Large models, pushing the boundary towards the big companies
* How do we bring solutions to Indian market?Lot of problems to solve in india. Indian entrepreneurs are doing well in b2b.
* Its nice to see prof. starting startups academics joins. No shortage of talent.
* Indian companies do not value research enough
* Truth - If roti, kapda, makan is sorted, go for entrepreneurship, Entrepreneurship involves delayed gratification. I need to have a support system at home. India is celebrating entrepreneurs. Team, investors to manage. Every moment you hit a new milestone.
* AI as an enabler/tool. Don't think you are in competition with ai. The question is, what to make?

Q and A
Q - BFSI (Banking, Financial Services and Insurance) Quantify benefit which ai will offer in case we migrate it from legacy system?
A - Energy and money is reducing, watch the trend. Check the cost curve, Future proofing, Have sufficient generalizability

Q - Is there any study if ai startups fail %
A - Very small % startup succeed. That's the nature of the game. Failed entrepreneur is oxymoron. Be willing to take on ambitious goal. The only way to succed is to take risk. Be open.



Inaugration Speeches

IISER is non profit
Goal - Make India among top 3 science and technology sector
Fast India - Is it a start up ? - Yes

- We do not celebrate science enough
- We need to answer the questions like how science happens
- We need to bring scientists face to face with young crowd

We think that science has power. Power to know. Power to answer how intelligence work. Science push economics.

debate - Is the world an illusion
prizes - Young NRI who did exemplary work in science
How ISRO came into being ?
Operation Sindoor - Defence research
The man who knew infinity - Book


Prof. Karandikar

Last two years initiatives
Fast India -
Establishment on Anusandhan NRF
Research and development fund
Technology development and commertialization
Translate research into technology
Commertialize technology
Boundaries between the research is disolving with interdisciplinary research
AI,
Enhance the public trust in science and scientist

Prof. Vijay Raghvan
Between solution to problem and answer to a question, answer is simple, solution is hard
Issues to be addressed: waste, pollution, traffic

Research institutions to be connected to world

Prof. Dhavan
- Bajaj - Scooter is sold in Latin America and ... -

Bajaj Representative
- Believe in people
- Bajaj facilitates research in their own premises


Building AI that powers and protects the digital workspace


Girija Narlikar

What is Google workspace?  "meet + drive + email + ... "
How do we keep users safe in the era of ai?
Too much email - AI as personal assistant?
Assists to create email replies better.
The current generation communicates in a short video.
What you can do with ai in email?
Example - Consumer email video. Echo friendly cleaning product. Launch the product
Use foundation model (LLM) - Gemini
Get improved productivity space with AI
AI stack of Gemini looks like
(
1. foundation model
2. google cloud
3. hardware (TPU hardware specialized to run the AI
)
what happens behind the scene when people build foundation model? - Look for an answer.
multimodality (video, audio, text, images) slides build by gemini

Explore
- genie3
- video 3m1
- gemini robotics  (instruct the robot)

AI
- multimodal understanding
- deeper reasoning
- powerful agentic features
- superior coding and development

Some Points:
* With a powerful foundation model, we can improve all the products
* Emotions are being replicated in different language
* Agentic Features - automated ways of connecting different app
* Foundation model to generate the question
* Foundation model to generate the answer

how do we manage risks
1. content safety, unsafe cotent
2. security

AI security vocabulary:
- prompt injection attack
- lab's user

Security Steps for a Task - summarize the email
1. input data
2. classifier (LLM of smaller size)
3. runtime instructions
4. Red teaming (experts in security)
5. model resilience (deepmind team improves resilience to security attacks)

Who are bad guys ? - state sponser actors to get intellectual property.
Is the email safe to keep in users inbox?
Lot of efforts goes into identifying spam.


Collaborative robots (Cobots)

Shared tasks
Human machine interactions

Application:
prothetic hand
survilance
surgery
drones collaborating in shapes
















Friday, 9 January 2026

Analysis of A Well Functioning India

 What is there in Maharashtrians which is different from Gujratis ? 


Despite having many positive characteristics, why do we think "मराठी माणूस काहीच करू शकणार नाही"


For Gujratis, their business is their first priority. As long as the business runs well, they have got nothing to do with politics.


As far as I know, Maharashtrians have advantage of "forward thinking (in any field)" and Gujratis have advantages of a "business mind, playing with money, understanding money". Its a known fact, that Maharashtrians are NOT so good with money, and their knowledge comes along with certain Ego. If Maharashtrians keep their "ego" aside and help Gujratis with their ideas in their business, NOT ONLY MUMBAI, the whole country will flourish. 


In India, people who are "gifted thinkers" are, "Maharashtrians", "Bengalis", "Tamilians". I am NOT saying rest of India does not think, but among the above three states, many are "thinkers". And I wonder why they all are not so good with "money" despite having talent !


And when it comes to "money" or rather "honestly working for money", "Gujratis", "Marwadis", "Punjabis" are much ahead. It would be a dream to think, all the above 6 states, should work in coordination with each other, rather than thinking "We can't do much if money dominates !". 


We have to remember, the priorities of "thinkers", are completely different from priorities of people with "money". So there are big chances, that they will not meddle with each other's work !


Like, if you see all the above "thinkers" states are very much concerned about "speaking in their own language". They all somehow have a fear, that their language is disappearing from the world map "soon" !


Whereas all the above "Business" states are least bothered about the language issue. For them, the first concern is "money". If they had to learn a new language to run their business, they won't hesitate to do so. I have personally known many people who have done so. With most of the business communities, you won't find "ego around language" as long as they can sustain their business.


Why Gujratis want their own people in politics, is probably because they think people from other states does not help them in business. If the people from "thinkers" states start helping them in business by providing "land", "man-power", "infrastructure" and "talent/ideas" etc, "business people" won't "prefer" to enter into polytics !



Ashish (Marathi, Kannada, Marwadi, Hindi, English)

Hiren's maternal family (Marathi, Gujrati, Hindi, English)

Tuesday, 6 January 2026

Kannada - I know so far

Some usual words (includes Verbs, Conjunctions, Nouns etc)

Yashtu - How many

Yaaru - Who all

Yelli - Where

Yen - What

Hege - How

Kuthkol - Have a seat

Ba - Come in

Hel - Tell me (especially, after picking up the phone)

athwa - or

mattu - and

Apay - danger (Written on electric poles)

jasti - More

kammi - Less 

bega - quickly

nodi - see


Some statements/questions in regular use 

Question: Uta Aayta ? Did you have food ?

Answer: sari - yes


Question: yen ide - What happened ?

Answer: yenu illa - Nothing 


Question: yen madtiya - येन माडतिया - what are you doing ?

Answer: sumne - Nothing much, just chilling


Question: nimma hesaru yenu - what is your name ?

Answer: Geetha


Question: nanu hogtini, nivu barthira ? - I am leaving, are you coming (will you come) ?

Answer: illa - No


gottha illa - I do not know 

gottha itha - I know

chanagi ide - It's good !

nanu hogtini - I will go, I am leaving

nanu barthini - I will come, I am coming

barthira - Will you come ? (question form)

hogi barthini - We will meet again or bye

beda - I do not want it

beku - I want it

neer beku - I want water

Ram mattu Shyam snehitaru - Ram and Shyam are friends

bega bega darshan - quick darshan



Address people

dodamma - Address an elder woman

chikkamma - Address a younger woman

dodappa - Address an elder man

chikkappa - Address a younger man

kutti - Little one


Counting

One - Ondhu

Two - Yeradu

Three - Moru

Four - Nalaku

Five - Aidu

Six - Aaru

Seven - Elu

Eight - Entu

Nine - Omatthu

Ten - Hattu




Sunday, 4 January 2026

आई बाबा

आई वडीलांचं आपल्या आयुष्यात खूप योगदान असल्याची समज मला आयुष्यात फार उशिरा आली ... जवळ जवळ वयाची पन्नाशी गाठल्यावर ... साधारणपणे मुलीच्या बाबतीत असं होत नाही ... सर्वसाधारणपणे मुली जास्त संवेदनशील असतात ... आणि आईवडिलांच्याच काय, परीवारातल्या सगळ्यांच्या योगदानाची आठवण ठेवतात ... त्यांना परतफेड करण्याची सुद्धा इच्छा असते ... आणि ती त्या प्रत्यक्षातही आणतात ... पण मी त्याला अपवाद आहे ... ही फार अभिमानाने सांगण्याची गोष्ट नाही ... अर्थातच ... आणि त्याच्या वर माझी आईपण शिक्कामोर्तब करते, की तू मुलगी नाही मुलगाच आहेस आमचा ... आईचे हे म्हणणे, भारतीय समाजातली पुरुषप्रधानता लक्षात घेता लोकांना कौतुक वाटण्याची शक्यता आहे ... पण तसा गैरसमज करून घेतला नाही तर बरं, कारण माझी आई हे बरेचसे रागावून म्हणते ...कौतुकाने नाही ... मी माझ्या वडिलांवर गेली आहे, असेही तिचे म्हणणे आहे ... पण परत कौतुक नाही, की वडिलांसारखी Engineer आहे ... फक्त वडिलांसारखी संतापते, असाच भाग आहे ... असो ... हे मी आईवर मजेशीर कौटुंबिक टीका म्हणून सांगितले ... त्यात फार काळजीचे कारण नाही ... पण विचार आला की माझ्या इथपर्यंतच्या आयुष्याचा जमाखर्च बघावा ... कारण आतापर्यंत स्वतःची career आणि  स्वतःच्या family life ला आवरता आवरता दमछाक झाली ... म्हणून आता निवांत पणे लिहायला घेतलं आहे ... आम्ही तिघी मुलीच आमच्या आईवडिलांना ... मुलगा हवा होता त्यांना सुद्धा त्या काळातल्या रीतींप्रमाणे ... पण नाही झाला ... आईवर राग होता माझ्या तिसऱ्या बहिणीच्या वेळी ... तिला hospital मध्ये बघायला गेले नाहीत ... जन्म झाला तेव्हा ... पण नंतर त्याच बहिणीवर सगळ्यात जास्त जीव ... तेवढेच वडिलांच्या बाबतीत gender discrimination म्हणता येईल ... त्यानंतर तिघींनाही जितके चांगले शिक्षण देता येईल तेवढे दिले ... तिघींनाही स्वतःच्या पायावर उभे राहता येऊ शकेल तिथपर्यंत आईवडील दोघांनी सर्वतोपरी मदत केली ... लहानपणी घरात वेगवेगळी खेळणी होती... एक तीन चाकी सायकल होती... एक piggy-bank होती... बाहुली घरात खूप उशिरा आली... तिघी मुली असून सुद्धा ... ती पण शेजारच्या aunty नी दिलेली ... सगळ्यात लहान बहिणीच्या पहिल्या वाढदिवसाला ... असे आई सांगते ... पण पुस्तके आणणं लवकर सुरू झालं... वडिलांनी मराठी बरोबर हिंदी पुस्तकेही आणून दिली ... लहान मुलांची ... पंचतंत्र, जातक कथाऐं, अकबर बिरबल, अमर चित्रकथा comics वगैरे...थोडे मोठे झाल्यावर शाळेतून बक्षिसे म्हणून पुस्तके मिळू लागली ... ती प्रामुख्याने पु.ल.देशपांडे आणि व.पु.काळे यांची ... काही आचार्य अत्रे, रणजित देसाई यांची ... उत्तमोत्तम पुस्तके ... बऱ्याच वेळेला शाळेत teachers विचारुन घेत असत ... बक्षिसे म्हणून कुठली पुस्तके पाहिजेत? ... एखादं पुस्तक घरी अगोदरच असेल तर repeat होऊ नये म्हणून... काही board-games वडिलांनी आणले ... बरेच board-games मामांनी आणले ... एकंदरीत घरात सापशिडी, ल्युडो, बुद्धीबळ, Scrabble, Brain-Vita असे board-games होते ... उन्हाळ्याच्या आणि दिवाळीच्या सुट्टीत शेजारच्या मुलांबरोबर खेळायचो ... बाहेर खेळायला badminton किंवा दोरीवरच्या उड्या हे outdoor games ... वडील आठवी पर्यंत घरी गणिताची उजळणी घ्यायचे ... ईंग्लिशच्या spellings चे पाठांतर रोज करवून घ्यायचे ... अभ्यासाचं time-table बनवायला वडिलांनी शिकवलं ... अभ्यासासाठी ... साधारण सहावी-सातवीत असेल ... Time-table ला अनुसरून अभ्यास करतात का मुली, हे ते १-२ वर्षं स्वतः पाहत असतं ... मग पुढे आमचे आम्ही time-table अनुसरू लागलो ... आईची स्वतः ची शिस्त होती ... सकाळी उठवणे, वेळेवर डबा तयार करणे, काही शाळेसाठी जरुरी वस्तू आणून ठेवणे ... वगैरे वगैरे ... परीक्षा झाली .. result चांगला लागला की एक cadbury ठरलेली असायची ... दर वर्षाला एक cadbury ... आम्हाला ते मोठे बक्षीस होते वडिलांकडून ... असे नाही की माझे वडील वर्षात जास्त cadburies देऊ शकत नव्हते ... ती ऐपत असेल ... पण प्रत्येक गोष्टीची एक किंमत असते ... चांगल्या result ची पण आणि बक्षीस म्हणून वडिलांकडून मिळालेल्या cadbury ची पण ... चांगल्या गोष्टींची किंमत करायला शिकवलं ... आई वडिलांमध्ये आपापले मतभेद होते ... थोडी काळजी वाटायची त्यांची आणि आम्हा मुलींचीही ...पण हा rough patch प्रत्येक घरात असावा ... त्यातून बाहेर आलं घर ... घरी सगळे संस्कार "कृतीतून" मिळाले ... तिघी मुली असून आईबाबांनी कधी equality वर प्रवचन न देता तिघींना equal संधी दिली ... शिक्षणाची ... मला आठवते, जेव्हा माझ्या Master's  च्या entrance exam चा result लागला, आजोबा वडिलांना म्हणाले होते, "मुलींना कशाला इतकं शिकवतोस? लग्न करून दे." ... पण वडिल त्यांच्या मतावर ठाम राहिले आणि त्यांनी मला पुढे शिकू दिले... त्यानंतर आम्ही तिघी मुली Engineer झालो ... बाबांना खूप अभिमान होता त्यात ... आमच्या achievements मध्ये त्यांनी स्वतःची achievement शोधली ... स्वतःच्या promotion साठी प्रयत्न केले नाहीत, कारण promotion वर दूरगावी पाठवले तर मुलींच्या शिक्षणात व्यत्यय येईल ... अंथरूण पाहून पाय पसरावे, म्हणजे आधुनिक भाषेत ज्याला planning आणि budgetting म्हणतात, ती आईची शिकवण ... घरी सुट्यांमधे पाहुणे असायचे ... परीस्थिती एक मध्यमवर्गीय मराठी कुटुंबाची होती ...  शिक्षण आणि मग नोकरी अशी विचारसरणी ... इतर चारचौघं मराठी घरांप्रमाणेचं ... 'व्यवसाय' वगैरे चे बाळकडू नाही मिळाले ... पण खूप चांगले संस्कार मिळाले ... वडील गायचे चांगले ... filmi गाणेच ... मोहम्मद रफी किंवा मुकेश ... पण चांगले गायचे ... मी लहान होते ... २-३ वर्षाची असेन ... बाबा गात असताना कुणी विचारले, कोण गातय ? तर मी म्हणायचे मोहम्मद रफी ... त्यांना खूप आनंद होता त्यात ... छोट्या छोट्या गोष्टीत आनंद होता ... वडिलांच्या स्वतःच्या घरी त्यांच्या लहानपणी पैशाची कमतरता होती ... वडिलांनी स्वतः दुसऱ्या विद्यार्थ्यांना शिकवून, पैसे मिळवून, त्यातून स्वतःचे शिक्षण पूर्ण केले ... आम्हाला मात्र वडिलांनी अभ्यासाच्या साधनात काही कमी पडू दिले नाही ... पण मुलांनी मुलांचा अभ्यास करावा आणि खेळावे किंवा इतर activities कराव्यात अशा मताचे ते आहेत ... मोठ्या माणसांमध्ये जास्त लक्ष घातले तर रागवायचे ... तो एक शिस्तीचा भाग होता ... एकदा घरी थोडे office चे उरलेले drawings करत होते .. मी विचारले "बाबा, काय करता आहात?" ... ते रागावले "तुला काय करायचे त्यात ?" ... त्यानंतर मी वडिलांना त्यांच्या कामाबद्दल एकही प्रश्न विचारला नाही ... "Mind your own business", हे फार लहानपणी शिकले मी ... चौथीत होते ... माझ्या वडिलांना परीस्थितीमुळे गाणं शिकणं शक्य नव्हतं ... पण त्यांना एकंदरीत वाटत असावं, की गाणं शिकल्या तर मुली कदाचित अभ्यासाकडे दुर्लक्ष करतील ... म्हणून मला वाटते कि घरात गाण्याचे महत्व असूनसुद्धा आम्ही मुली गाणं शिकलो नाही ... औपचारीक रीतीने ... वडिलांना गाण्याची आणि movies ची पण आवड आणि नावडही तितकीच तीव्र ...नावडती movie असली की ते अक्षरशः त्रासून जातात ... channel change करायचा अक्षरशः हुकूम सुटतो ... आम्ही जेव्हा मोठे झालो, तेव्हा नवऱ्याच्या आणि स्वतःच्या आवडीचे movies आणि गाणी बघायला लागलो ... पण तोपर्यंत remote control बाबांच्या हाती होता ... कारण नवीन सगळ्या movies बाबांना मानवणाऱ्या नव्हत्या ... बाबांची सर्वप्रथम आवडती गोष्ट म्हणजे movie मधली गाणी ... गाण्यासाठी movie ... दुसऱ्या क्रमांकावर नायक व त्याची भूमिका ... त्यानंतर मग story वगैरे सगळं ... सरळ हिशोब ... जास्त करून हिंदी movies आणि गाणी ... आता मराठी घरात हिंदी गाणी जेव्हा वाजायची, तेव्हा आमचे मराठी नातेवाईक थोडे अस्वस्थ व्हायचे ... त्याचे कारण आईवडील मध्यप्रदेशातील होते आणि नातेवाईक संपूर्ण मुंबईकर ... शंभर टक्के महाराष्ट्रीयन ... वडिलांना वाटत असे, मी चांगली जुनी गाणी लावली आहेत, तर ते लोक आनंदात असतील ... वडिलांना हे माहीत नव्हते, कि त्या काळी दक्षिण भारतीय लोकांसारखा मराठी माणूस पण हिंदी चा तिरस्कार करत असे ... हिंदीचा संबंध बहुतांशी उर्दूशी किंवा स्पष्ट सांगायचे तर इस्लामी संस्कृतीशी जोडला जात असे ... माझ्या लक्षात आमच्या नातेवाईकांची अस्वस्थता यायची ... पण कदाचित वडिलांना समजले नाही, कि समजल्यावर सुद्धा काय करावं ते कळलं नाही, ते मला माहित नाही ... कारण माझे वडील गप्पा मारणाऱ्या लोकांपैकी नव्हते ... म्हणून नातेवाईक जमल्यावर गाण्याशिवाय दुसरे काही करणार काय, हा त्यांच्यापुढे  मोठा प्रश्न होता ... म्हणून ते गाणी record करून पाहुण्यांना ऐकवायचे ...आम्ही मुली आणि बायको तर होतोच ऐकणाऱ्यांमधे .... असो ... माझ्यासाठी movie निवडण्याचा मार्ग म्हणजे newspaper मधली story आणि reviews ... अर्थात सगळेच reviews मान्य होत नाहीत, पण story कळते ... story बहीण किंवा मैत्रीणीकडून कळली तरी चालते ...त्यांचा review तर सगळ्यात उत्तम ... कारण निवडीचा साधारण अंदाज एक असतो ... असा आमच्या घरांमध्ये गाण्यांचा आणि movies चा प्रवास चालत असतो ... अलिकडे, जर माहित असलेल्या movies परत बघायच्या असतील, तर त्या director च्या नावावरुन बघते ... director मुळे एखाद्या गोष्टी कडे किंवा घटनेकडे बघण्याचा त्यांचा दृष्टिकोन कळतो ... director ची आणि आपली मते कुठेतरी match होतात ... movie आपली वाटते ... त्या director च्या नवीन movies कुठल्या आहेत हे समजतं ... असो ... विषयांतर झालं ... आईचा आनंद तिच्या मुलींमध्ये किंवा माहेरच्या पद्धतीने खाण्याचे पदार्थ बनवण्यात आहे आणि होता ... आम्ही आणि आमच्या नवऱ्यांमध्ये जेव्हा मतभेद होतात, तेव्हा त्याचे कारण आम्ही मुलीच आहोत, यावर आई ठाम असते ... ते आईचं gender discrimination आहे ... जावई म्हणजे "राजस सुकुमार, मदनाचा पुतळा" आहे तिच्या दृष्टीने ... त्यावरून तिचे व माझ्या मधल्या बहिणीचे वाद होतात ... मी आईला त्या बाबतीत सुधारायला जात नाही ... काही गोष्टींना उपाय नसतो ... सोडूनि द्यावे ... अशा मताची मी आहे ... असो ... वडिलांचं गाणं किंवा गुणगुणणंही आता बंद झालं ... वडिलांनी शिकवलं की आपले विचार पाहिजे, आपली खास निवड पाहिजे ... प्रत्येक बाबतीत ... गाणी निवडताना सुद्धा ... गाण्याच्या किंवा movies च्या बाबतीत आपलं मत देताना सुद्धा ...आपले विचार पाहिजे ... इतरांच्या मताशी प्रत्येक वेळी सहमत होऊन चालत नाही ... आईवडिलांच्या योगदानाची परतफेड करणं फार कठीण असतं ... आम्ही मुलींनी आईवडीलांना आमच्या घराजवळ राहायला बोलविले ... थोडी वर्ष ते नको म्हणत होते, पण गेले ३ वर्षे आमच्या जवळ राहतात ... आम्हाला खूप आनंद आहे त्यात ...

If I can not take care of the children, I will not have them

We can grow along with children, if children are cared properly. Especially when children start learning and if we learn along with them, it...